actually i am sad right now... i stepped out of my room in order to talk to someone in ym.... and remain in cathartic mode... this day is full of frustrations and disappointments...

i only get TOO excited once in a while... as in SUPER excited over something.. and this day's frustration's one of those few moments i got so excited about...i was supposed to watch stardust with my housemate.. actually, i've been asking all my housemates to come and watch the movie, but they all decline, except for one.. so last night, i scheduled my day.. compartmentalizing the things to be done in the morning so that at the end of the day, i would be free to relax and enjoy the film... stardust was supposed to be the film that i'll be next watching since transformers.. i've been so busy for the past months because of my acads that i neglect to see the beautiful films that passed.... (if there's any..)... plus, i do not easily go for movie watching... as in i pick the film that i be watching on the big screen coz i know it's worth watching for...

will i ever see you???

apparently you now know why i started my post with sadness.. because things were not ok.. i was not able to watch.. my housemate texted me late in the afternoon that he has to finish some hospital works and that he was not sure though.... that's the thing... i hate the fact that i get disappointed for no reason at all.. i could not blame anyone.. not even my housemate because it's nobody's fault anyways... but i hate it... i hate the idea of being sad for a very shallow reason, yet for me, it's a big deal... i hate it whenever i get too excited over something yet in the last minute the plan's changed.. plus i hate it that this happened simultaneous with my depression as the semester ended... yes, i was so depressed yesterday... and i was thinking that this day could somehow overcome my depression... and have a good start for my sem break...

another reason that bothers me is that i was supposed to be home in batangas yesterday pa, but because i was expecting this movie thing today, i postponed it.. in short, i sacrificed my vacation at home over this event that i have been looking forward.... hay....what a day.. last night i was quite ok as i bond with my housemates... but why is it that whenever i get to have a sweet taste of euphoria, there's an extreme loneliness that comes in return... what a relationship!!!!!

hay... when i get home, i'll lock my self up again in room... and doing my thing to regain my momentum at least for tomorrow..... hay... stardust... a star that turned into a dust..... :-(